Promises, promises

Here is DovBear's take on Shas' promise of heaven for a vote.

Here is Robin Williams' take on Osama's luck when he gets to heaven:

Osama Bin Laden died and went to heaven.

He was greeted by George Washington, who slapped him and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"

Patrick Henry then approached and punched Osama in the nose. After that, James Madison entered and kicked him in the shin. He was followed by an angry Thomas Jefferson, who whacked Osama over the had with a cane.

The thrashing continued as John Randolph, James Monroe and 66 other early Americans came in and unleashed their anger on the terrorist leader.

Suddenly, as Osama lay writhing in unbearable pain, an angel appeared.

"This is not what you promised me," Osama said to the angel.

"Come on, Osama," the angel replied. "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you in heaven."